Children’s fears: “Mom, I’m scared! “
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Children’s fears: “Mom, I’m scared!”
Every mother must have heard from the lips of their child such a phrase. Adults usually find such statements children the next Caprice. But should first ask yourself: do we help the child to overcome the fear or begin to manipulate it?
Meanwhile, fears inherent in all children. This is a normal stage of maturation of the psyche, a natural reaction to the knowledge of the outside world. No need to worry about parents, because fear is based on creative thinking.
The development of fears associated with the mental development of the child – the child afraid of what they don’t know or understand. The degree of fear may change depending on the imagination of the child. The more the child is gifted with a rich imagination, especially since he’s shy.
Fear is fear, a state of anxiety, restlessness, mental confusion in front of any danger or trouble. Distinguish between natural fears and neurotic.
Natural fears are temporary and resolve spontaneously. Parents are required only to support, attention. Adults should mitigate the experiences of the child and to ensure that the experiences were not Intrusive and prolonged.
Neurotic fears are the result of psychological trauma, violence, family conflicts, high level of anxiety among parents. They hinder the child to live a normal life, have a detrimental effect on the nervous system. The result is poor sleep, irritability, stuttering, aggressiveness, poor contact with others. Here the child needs your help, such fears themselves are not.
Causes of children’s fears:
Parental bullying . It is often possible to observe a picture, as the mother begins to scare your child with various creatures, Jinn. For example: “you make babayka will complain!” or “don’t go to sleep – take Baba Yaga”.
Excessive custody . Often the adults are trying agradecimiento from all kinds of trouble, for example phrases: “touch Not the cat, and then catch”, “don’t climb the hill will fall!”. As a result, the child unwittingly takes over these fears and is afraid of everything. In such circumstances, he is unable to develop the skills of psychological protection. But the kid needs to learn to overcome difficulties and fears.
Parents can pass on their fears to children . If the mother in childhood afraid of something, that fear may be exposed and her daughter or son. The child is very sensitive and feels begins to fear the same.
Constant conflicts between the parents . Children growing up in families with neblagopriyatnym psychological climate, more susceptible to anxiety. This makes them anxious, aggressive, inattentive.
Children’s imagination . Children are usually very emotional. They begin to invent fears.
Younger children usually begin to imitate older brothers or sisters, not understanding the nature and cause of fear.
Fear resulting from the injury . If the child was bitten by a dog, he might be afraid of animals, fear of the Elevator, if it is stuck. The result is a restless sleep, nightmares. Such fears are easier to treat, and sometimes go away on their own.
Scientists have proven that girls are more susceptible to anxiety than boys because they are more emotional. At the same time, boys from single-parent families are more afraid. After the divorce, they are often deprived of male support, and this affects the communication with peers, and — as a consequence — increasing number of fears.
If you notice that your child is afraid of something, in any case, don’t abuse it. Don’t scare him, not to ridicule, calling a coward. The child may withdraw and be alone with your fear. Remember, you are the dearest person for him. Only you can trust and tell about their fears. Treat this with understanding. Ask what exactly he is afraid. You can choose to manage childish fears, using various psychological techniques.
1. Suggestion. For example, “You are strong, courageous… You will cope….”. In this case, your voice must be very affectionate and confident, as it has a great impact on the child.
2. Drawing fears. Try to draw a source of concern on paper and burn it. Then explain to your child that fear is no more. Do not forget to praise your toddler repeating what he is bold and large, well done, as was able to defeat fear.
3. Molded from clay . Let the child rolls the ball, saying: “I throw out fear.” Then the ball goes in the trash.
4. Game . In the 20-ies of the last century psychotherapists A. Freud, M. Klein, G. hug-Helmuth called the game method of treatment in which children develop their abilities, learn to overcome their fears, conflicts and troubles.
Very often children begin to be afraid of animals. The game – the best psychotherapy. You can run for wolf (one of the players wears a wolf mask) with a gun. And “the wolf” himself begins to fear. In the game, and you can be a wolf, Baba Yaga, to scare mom and grandmother, to laugh at their fear. Laughter kills fear. The child turned scary into something funny, no longer terrible for him being.
5. To tell a story . In it, for example, the main character can be a child with the same name as yours, who knows how to conquer your fears. And you can choose any children’s character who is faced with various difficulties and definitely overcomes them myself. Another option is to create a superhero who will help your child to cope with fear.
6. To lay down their fears in a box. All that scares a child, lay in one place, seal with tape and take away.
And finally, a few recommendations. Give the child the freedom of choice and action. Don’t limit it in motion. Teach him how to be independent. More walk in the parks, so that your child used to other people.
From the early years to nurture the child’s faith in Allah. Teach your child to worship our Lord and turn to Him with any fears and worries. The child should fear only Allah, the Commission of the sin and the harm can cause people. This is a natural fear, and he should not be excessive or insufficient.